Back to Square 1

So, turns out our 'renter' caused more damage than we thought- stove no longer works, sprinklers weren't winterized and there is water pipe damage, there's a leak the basement... and our buyer cancelled. We will lower the price and add these things into the disclosure and probably the bank and realtors will get their money but none will come to us. That's providing we get another buyer before the house goes to the bank.

More Ebay

I'll be listing more things on Ebay- trying to pare down the stuff and bump up the bank account! Please check them out and pass the word on. I'll be including some China stuff.

Lots more added recently- quite an eclectic mix of things. Please check them out and let friends know. Thanks!

the latest

Here is Kim in the play put on by the middle school students. It was written by the drama coach and her husband and was a play within a play- showing an acting group trying to put on Macbeth with a fussy artistic Hollywood director and a penny pinching producer who made her wealth producing cheap furniture (played by Kim). The jokes were a bit over the little kids heads but the whole production was very nicely done. Kim shone in her role.

After the play the actors answered the kids' questions about putting on a play. We weren't able to attend the evening show but friends went to support Kim (and bring her home). I'm happy she has creative outlets and friends at school.

Offer on the House

We've had an offer (well, 2 actually) on the house and countered the best and it was accepted. We are now under contract. In 3 to 4 weeks the bank will get its money, the Realtors will get theirs, I'll have some left to pay other debts and tithe to our church and life will go on. What a long road this has been.

Kim

My oldest, Kim, is a really cool kid. She's moving out in ways I didn't expect- like BASKETBALL! She's really taken to the game and is an aggressive player. Who knew? I was a big basketball fan as a kid- my dad used to take me to Indiana University games when Bobbie Knight was coach (I still have signed programs among my souvenirs). I never played- we didn't have girl's basketball when I was in school and I flunked cheerleading by incurring injuries before try-outs (a broken arm in 5th grade and a split knee that needed stitches in Jr. high- after that I became a yearbook photographer and still got to go to the games). She plays at school and has been taking a class at the YMCA - one of our luxuries. She'll be in the Spring league at the Y starting in April. And we have a great friend who is happy to come get Kim and shoot baskets with her.

And she's in a play at school- Macbeth with a Twist. Her director is really proud of the way she's come out of her shell and just owns the part. They have been doing rehearsals for weeks and the big show is next week. They have a few day shows for the school kids and one evening show- they've been doing make up, sets and costumes- it's quite the production. I volunteer at school on Wednesday so will get the preview when they do the show for the little kids. We're inviting friends for the evening show.

Court

Today was the hearing for damages owed me by the squatter who inhabited my house and drove it into foreclosure. The judgment was in my favor. The defendant, when asked by my attorney where he lived at the moment tried to take the 5th amendment! Then he claimed he didn't know his address. He 'works for himself but doesn't have any work at the moment.' What do you think the chances are that I'll ever get any of the money he owes?

Refrigerator Magnets

I believe, if you can separate the gold from the dross, our refrigerator magnets say something about us. I came across a ziplock bag full of magnets when I was unpacking the things from our old house and one of the things they say about me is that I don't easily part with things. I believe some of these -OK, I KNOW- some of these date from my grad school days! And that would be in the umpph days. Sorry, frog in my throat. Of course you have to weed out the magnets that belong to the kids to get the true picture- the dog mouthed lower case abc letters are not mine, nor are the Cinderella dress up magnet or the Cars movie magnets. No, mine say things like "A CLEAN HOUSE IS A SIGN OF A WASTED LIFE" or "Oh, oh, a full moon and worse yet a giant Mr Potato Head!" Yeah that last one is from grad school. Others from that era include retro cartoon women saying things like "If they can put one man on the moon, why not all of them?" and "Oh no, I can't believe I forgot to have kids!"

Then I have the big square Chinese characters for happiness and strength, the Marvin the Martian saying "Oh, you have made me very angry, very angry indeed!" and in the same vein a rectangular black magnet with white letters that says "DON'T MAKE ME COME DOWN THERE - GOD". All of those post date having kids as does the one that says "BE NICE OR LEAVE, THANK YOU." Funny how I went from whimsical to worried about manners.

What's on your refrigerator?

Loads of Kid's books!

Check out my Ebay listings if you want to enlarge your kids library! We are parting with much of our library- which had close to 1000 kids books at one time. All part of the downsizing. The kids aren't the only ones giving things up- I'm finally letting go off all my books collected during graduate school (those are a bit more specialized- British history and archaeology).

Introductions Pt. 2 - No breaks!

We are a California family. We've recently returned to California from a brief and unsuccessful sojourn in Colorado where we'd hoped to find a better (less expensive/more space) quality of life. We left California at the height of the real estate boom and returned in the midst of the downturn. Prior to our unhappy wild west adventure we lived here in Ventura, California and when things didn't work out in Colorado we came home.

If you've followed us from my earlier blog you'll know we are undergoing some difficulties due to our Colorado house being rented to someone who wouldn't pay rent or move out. Legal action and a sheriff's deputy finally got him out last month and we have a hearing for damages this week. Unfortunately it is too late and the bank is foreclosing on the house. So it's a race against time to sell it before the bank takes possession. As well we are victims of the downturn in the economy so the oft heard theme of 'times are tough/money is tight' has a personal ring for us. My Ebay side business brings in a little extra and we are cutting back on optional expenses like cable tv. We've long since given up on eating out, movies, and other costly entertainments. Some expenses still arise, unplanned and unavoidable. Today it was the brakes on the mini-van which have been groaning at every stop for some time and are at the point of just failing to stop. The auto shop says we need rear and front brakes at a cost of $800. Time to see what else I can put on Ebay!

Gadgets

When I started blogging Google didn't have all the little neat gadgets that they do now- check out the one at the bottom of the page. I'll change it every so often so check back. Frankly the hangman game I've got there now is stumping me!

Domestic Adoption - In China

Interesting article:

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123683410215005161.html

Introductions

You probably already know us- if you've followed us from our old blog- but if you've stumbled on us lately here's a little background. I'm a (er, older) single mom with four children, all from China. I was very lucky, though I didn't know it at the time, to go into China adoption at the right time. I submitted my first paperwork in 1997 with CCAI and adopted my oldest (Kim) in 1998. We were a great little unit of mom and daughter and then I started to feel that Kim would benefit from a sister- someone from the same background. One mom and one daughter was a small family- especially when my 3 siblings didn't have children so there were no cousins to play with. So I submitted new paperwork in 2000- the same year my mother was tragically killed while conducting census data collection for Census 2000. In our last conversation she said she was glad I was getting Kim a sister. Sadly Kim was the only one of my children she met. I brought Corey home in January 2002 at 15 months of age.

Her arrival did not go as smoothly as I'd hoped. Although a non-special needs adoption she was very sick in China and (we found out much later) had a 40% hearing loss in both ears that hindered her language development. She hated me and Kim on sight and, the opposite of Kim, was a strong willed and loud child. Still, eventually we got her medical issues dealt with (I think she had at least 4 surgeries to deal with the hearing loss) and spent 2 years in speech therapy and she grew hair and emerged a smart, beautiful, outgoing and talkative child.

And life was going along smoothly with two beautiful girls and then I got a nice raise and thought- hmm, what can I do with this extra $10,000? And having totally forgot what chaos Corey had thrown our household into, I decided to take a look at yet another adoption.

I found Alia on a special needs list with IAAP (I totally recommend this agency by the way). She had a heart defect. She was an exquisitely beautiful girl and I felt blessed to be chosen as her mom. I traveled alone (no companions) to Xian to pick her up in December 2004. Luckily Alia was in a very good orphanage, run by a western Christian charity, and she had lots of opportunities compared to my first two. I got a photo album of her time in the orphanage that included visits to parks, Christmas activities, and even eating fries at Kentucky Fried Chicken! So then we were a family of 4.

And all was well. Then about 6 months after I brought Alia home a friend asked me to help her find a special needs baby on the adoption lists and I went looking. I did find one for her. And I also found this entirely cute little 2 year old boy with a repaired heart defect who was smiling in every photo.I couldn't believe he hadn't been adopted. What a charmer. I kept going back and looking at his information, convinced each time that there would be a "reserved" tag on his photo. But weeks went by and all the other kids on the list were being taken and he was still waiting. And I was convinced that there was NO WAY the adoption agency would even consider a single mom with 3 kids a good candidate for his family...so, being quite sure I'd get the royal brush-off I placed an inquiry. The response? OF COURSE THEY'D LOVE IT IF I ADOPTED HIM! Ooops!

So... In February 2006, Kim, Corey, my sister and I all headed back to China and on Valentine's day I got my little sweetheart. And as I tell people I found out my limit was 3 by adopting my 4th!

Now- I won't say I regret any of these adoptions. How could I when I've been blessed with such smart, beautiful, capable children and when I think where they (and I) might have been. But even with all the adoption preparation courses you take, the books you read, the lists you belong to for advice and information, the earlier kids you parent... I don't know that you can be adequately prepared to be a single mom of 4 kids! Hence the 'Adventures' of our family!

Welcome!

This blog- Adventures of Zenmomma Plus 4, part 2- is taking over as the public part of my old blog- Adventures of Zenmomma Plus 4 which has gone private for a variety of reasons. This blog will allow followers of the old blog to continue to keep up with our family in a general sort of way. Most posts will focus on how the kids - Kim, Corey, Alia and Eli, all adopted from China over the past 10 years- are doing and what they are up to.

To begin I want to share one of my last posts from the old blog: These concoctions are my son Eli's creations. He's 6 years old, the size of a 3 year old and a special needs (heart) adoption from China. When I brought him home he was assessed as mildly mentally retarded. But recent re-evaluations have shown that isn't the case at all. What we don't know is just how smart he is! Note the symmetry in these free choice projects:

He loves to build!